Things That Make Me Happy

  1. Sitting on the bridge and staring at the stars with you was one of my favourite things to do but the stars are too far away and now so are you so I guess I’ll have to make do with the paper stars that I put in a jar so I can reach out and touch them whenever I need.
  2. Tea and a cigarette on a breezy morning with Paul Anka playing in the background could make me happy in a minute but now they just remind me of your smell mixed with cigarette smoke and sweat and I’d rather shut the window when it’s breezy out and I’d rather sleep in than think of you.
  3. I have a new deodorant now because the old one just reminds me of how much you liked it and how when we spend afternoons in bed, our scents would mix together and make a new fragrance unto itself but now I can’t even bare to use my old deodorant.
  4. I remember sitting on your bed, tucked under a blanket, smoking a joint and not talking about anything consequential and gosh I would give anything to go back to that night in 102 when we spent hours talking about toothpaste and crickets and the right kind of green.
  5. Do you remember that night when we were sitting in your room drinking alcohol mixed with coke from plastic bottles, laughing away at silly things and serous things and not caring about anything going on beyond those four walls?
  6. You’re not around to make fun of me for wearing t shirts of only solid colours and so I wear them as often as you can and hope that you notice and I know I saw you smile the other day when I wore one and I smiled too.
  7. You’ve moved on and I’m busy making new friends too and I feel like it’s time to move on na? Have you moved on already?
  8. I loved showing you notes and things I’d written in my notebook and I loved that you wrote in it too but now I can’t deal with looking at your handwriting all over my it and so I think it’s time to buy a new notebook.
  9. I’ve always loved hugs from people I love but your hugs made me feel like I was safe and at home but home is never going to be you and so I learned to hold myself up and I’m okay.
  10. I’m learning something new everyday now like today I learned to listen to your favourite song without crying and tomorrow I’m going to learn to walk past you without being bothered.

Okay so I know this is shitty, I was writing in a hurry. But I plan to eventually at some point use all 10 of these individually as prompts for writing other stuff. Right now they are all just about this one person who I’m not supposed to think about. Also, the words in italics were my prompt for writing this. So basically, in poetry club, we were supposed to make a list of ten things that made us happy/sad/angry/scared. One girl write these 10 things which are in italics as her things that make her happy. I was supposed to write a poem using them but I didn’t have time then so I just wrote this instead.

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