(For the course of this post, I’m going to refer to my college as AU)

So at AU, things like not being straight or whatever is no big deal at all. Like I really don’t have to worry about homophobia. In fact, sometimes I feel like I live in a bubble, don’t have to care about what I wear or how “revealing” my clothes are or what my sexuality is!

But I also forget that the entire world isn’t like that! So I started doing my internship at this company a couple of weeks back and it’s going okay but one thing that really bothers me is the casual homophobia in little things.

On my first or second day, during lunch, I was sitting with some colleagues who were talking about random stuff and one guy was telling a story about how their college seniors used to bully the juniors and how they used to bully this one guy who was gay. And honestly, I didn’t know how to react. And then today, I don’t know what the conversation was but somehow this actor came up who is rumored to be gay and then suddenly all the voices got hushed and someone was telling a story and idk it was just bad. And like I can’t really do anything about it but I just don’t know how to deal?

Like I know I can’t say anything cuz it’s not safe enough to. I guess these little things make me think twice (and thrice and more than that!??) about whether I should come out to people outside of my school and college friends. Like idk how family and outsiders will react. And honestly, I don’t give a fuck about outsiders but I do think that my extended family won’t take it well which will be bad for my family cuz ew family conflicts. In fact I don’t even know how my mom will react!? I know my sis will be cool with it though so that’s good.

Anyway, that’s it. Just something I was thinking about. Oh and also Happy Pride Month!!! 🙂


June Goals!?

So apparently, I’m now a sorted-in-life type of person who has monthly goals and what not! Anyway, here goes –

  1. Go to the gym 25 out of 30 days.
  2. Make at least 2-3 paintings (mixed feeling about this one but I think i’ll save that for another post).
  3. Read at least 5 books.
  4. Post at least 15 blog posts (I genuinely just need and want to write more. I’ve gotten into a bad habit of just like idk not talking about stuff and blogging helps me vent so much so yeah).
  5. Meet up with at least 5 friends (Note to self – social isolation is not good for you, you idiot).
  6. Keep doing the Korean course. (so I did a thing that is I started learning Korean online and I always abandon these kinds of projects of mine but agh I really want to do this so I’m going to do this!)
  7. Start journaling and paying more attention to my black notebook! Like wtf why am I neglecting this when it actually makes me feel better!???
  8. Okay I don’t really have an 8th point but I hate ending on an odd number so umm anyway bye!