I think I’ve mentioned that this past semester, I was going for therapy once a week at college. And honestly, it was helping. But then vacations started and I’m at home now which means no more therapy. And also, there’s going to be a new therapist when I go back cuz the one I was seeing last sem left.

So it’s kinda confusing. The thing is, I’ve never had proper therapy before so I don’t know how this is supposed to go, I don’t know if it was helping or not, she didn’t give me any diagnosis or anything and idk really. I was just doing it cuz I didn’t know what else to do. And honestly, I plan on continuing next sem cuz it did help a little, talking about things I’ve never said out loud before and what not.

I just wish I could continue therapy over the summer but I can’t because it would involve TOO much lying and sneaking out and it’s too fucking expensive.

Another thing is about medication. People keep asking me if i’m on meds but I’m not and everyone tells me I should talk to the doc about it but honestly, idk if I want to. Firstly, it’s too expensive. Secondly, a lot of lying and sneaking around family. And lastly, the adjustment period for psych meds is terrible and idk if I’m up for all that specially cuz I have to deal with it all on my own :/

But anyway, that’s the update on that front, let’s see how the summer goes! (CANNOT WAIT FOR COLLEGE TO REOPEN!)


Things I Learned About Relationships In Freshman Year

(Wow why is the title is so long!?)

So as I mentioned in my previous post, I am going to be writing a series of what I learned about _______ in my freshman year and so here’s one about relationships. And by relationships I mean, both, friendships and romantic relationships. Now, trust me, I fucked up a lot so here’s some stuff I learned (or am still learning tbh) –

  1. Don’t force it. This has to be number one learning! Yes, put effort in your relationships but don’t force it. If it’s meant to happen, it will. You shouldn’t feel like your effort isn’t being reciprocated. (This is v important for me cuz I’m the type of person who gets stuck on things, even things that don’t work).
  2. Relationships get made without you realizing it. Over pancakes in the middle of the night, over panic attacks, on the bridge listening to Katy Perry, over having “alternate” sexualities, anything really!
  3. It is so important to have a good roommate relationship. You’re going to be living with this person for the entire year, so might as well be nice and have a comfortable situation. I’m so lucky that my roommate and I get along so well that we are rooming together next year too!
  4. Sometimes space is important. For you and the other person. Give it time. It’ll be okay.
  5. Don’t let anyone give you shit for your relationships as long as you’re happy with your decisions. Honestly, whether it’s a friends with benefits relationship, or a serious “I’ll someday marry you” relationship, don’t let anyone shame you for it!
  6. Form relationships/friendships/whatever with your seniors. Honestly, they can be so amazing and helpful in you getting through college. They know all the coll hangout places and what to do and what not to. And really, they can become great friends (again, i’m so fucking lucky! my seniors are the absolute best!).
  7. Different friends have different roles to play in your life. Some friends will be there to make you laugh and to chill with, others will be there when you need to cry/vent. It’s unfair to expect everything from just one person.
  8. Giving people paper cranes is a good way to make friends. Trust me. (just a warning though – it is a little random and might confuse people?)
  9. Food helps you bond with people. Enough said about this one.
  10. oh my god just trust me but friendships and relationships and people save you and help you save yourself ahhh they are so nice and pure and lovely and i love making friends wow but also be careful and take your time but yeah okay thanks.

That’s pretty much it. Wow I’m feeling so wise!

Pls to share your “things I learned” in the comments?