So last night I had a panic attack. It was really strange because I couldn’t even figure out what triggered it. So basically I’m sitting in my room doing nothing and suddenly I start feeling like I can’t fucking breathe. And like my organs are shutting down. And I start crying like a crazy person. Then after like an hour or so, I calm myself down and decide that the best thing to do here is to distract myself. And somehow this whole thing brought some clarity to my mind. My mind has been on shut down mode for a few weeks now but after this incident I had this weird feeling of clarity and I actually got some school work done so that was kind of good.
Then today, at school, I’m just sitting with a friend of mine (kaii) and then I just start stressing out about I don’t even know what. And then I ask kaii if she would go to the restroom with me and then I just start laughing hysterically. Like crazy. And I just couldn’t stop for like 10 minutes. And there wasn’t even anything funny happening and I wasn’t even happy. I just fucking lost my shit.
It’s been a very strange couple of days. One minute I’m crazy happy and the next minute I’m in tears. It might have something to do with my lack of sleep. I haven’t slept properly for two nights! Why do I do this!? But like I’m not even upset about these two incidents, I’m kinda amused actually! Okay, this is weird. Okay Bye.